Developing the Success Personality
We all want to be successful. The trouble is that some of us are successful and some of us are not successful. So the question remains, what makes a successful person tick? And, what are they doing that non-successful people are not doing?
I believe wholeheartedly that we can all be successful in our chosen fields and endeavours. You can achieve the things that you truly desire. But, there are certain rules to the game of success that cannot be ignored.
Success has a definition and therefore, in itself, is an achievable goal. But it is not an object to actually strive towards. It doesn’t have a single characteristic that makes it possible to say ” I want to be successful, so I’ll strive for success!”. We must define exactly what our activity is, what success in that activity is and what forms of action and planning it will take to arrive at the point where we can say ” I am Successful”.
People make mistakes. That is a good thing. Mistakes and Success are like light and darkness, both must exist in order to define each other. It is in our nature to learn from our mistakes. From now on your should develop the attitude that making mistakes is not a sign of failure, it is a sign that you are being brave enough to take action, to delv into the unknown and slowly but surely build the path towards your success.
When people fail or make a mistake they often become plagued by feelings of guilt,shame and blame themselves for being stupid. The next step is re-coil, they tend to go into self-protect mode and spend time looking for a safe-zone where they can distance themselves from the actions that appeared like failure. This action is a mistake. It is a worse mistake than the first one! Successful people develop resilience very quickly so that when they make a mistake, they stick with it and investigate what went wrong. Often discovering that most of their actions where right on the button but they got just one or two things wrong. Hence they discover and learn from the mistake and keep going.
Clarity of purpose is essential to in order to become successful in any activity. This means that you need to have a very clear picture of exactly what it is that wish to achieve. Being able to state your goal in one small sentence is good but you must be able to elaborate on it, explain it to yourself in detail and visualize the end result in your mind. You must have clarity.
When you are very clear in your mind about the nature of your goal you can begin to strive towards it. You will be in the position to see the tiny details that are the mechanics of the whole objective.
Create Your Own Future
When successful people talk about their goals they often explain in astonishing detail about the nature of it. They have a clear, lucid picture in their minds. This picture comes from absolute focus on the object – the goal. Successful people have set their goal in terms of words on paper and then worked it through with note taking and corrections and then finally reached the on paper expression of the idea so that they are absolutely satisfied with it. The next step is that they begin to internalise the whole goal. It becomes a part of the person and they begin to act according to their thoughts about the goal.
The internalization of their goals means that the whole idea of the goal takes root in their mind. When this happens they can’t help but to begin to act out the actions required to achieve the goal. The Goal Thought is as natural as any other thought. If you want to eat or sleep it occurs as a thought. You’ve practiced these thoughts throughout your life and you don’t argue with them. You just follow the thoughts of sleeping and eating with action. When your goals become internalised thoughts they will develop into solid mental impulses that continuously prompt you to action.
Self Knowledge Defines Your Goals
To be successful you must have goals – without them you are in big danger of foundering on the rocks very quickly. Goals are so important. They are the basis of your plans and they are the thoughts that when internalised, will be your motivation. Motivation will ensure that you are persistent in your efforts when you strive towards the realisation of your goal. Self knowledge is the ey to knowing what you really want. When sit down to plan your goals you must be brutally honest with yourself otherwise you will either sell yourself short or simply choose goals that are not really what you want.
Goals!
Unfortunately there is a lot of hype about, telling people how to easily get the desires of their hearts . Much of this hype s often accompanied by photos of suggestions of the sort of goals that people tend to dream about. A Yacht or a Porsche, a large house in a country setting with a matching pair of hunting dogs. Laying around on a sun drenched beach. Most people wouldn’t want to spend the rest of their lives laying around, especially motivated, life-loving people. I presume you love life enough to want to make something of it. These types of goal are nothing but stereo typing rich people and they probably have nothing in common with your real needs.
Self knowledge is the place where you will recognise your true goals. They will be things and objects that you simply know are right for you and our family. Your goals will come from your heart. You already know what you want but you may not have clarified them until now. You must search yourself to discover what will make you happy. You may discover that after a lot of soul searching, your goals are mostly internal issues that you wish to overcome or eliminate from your life. They may be material – you may know that the lack of money in your life is the one thing that causes stress and emotional turmoil. If that be the case , then don’t feel guilty that you need to work on wealth creation, feel happy that you know what you truly need in life. Just be honest with yourself when creating your goals and you will find that it will be the motivator that keeps you focused on the end results.
Gaining Self-Knowledge is a process. Self education is the path that will reveal your true self to you. The first step is to be honest with yourself and to look yourself in the face and admit that you may be a well rounded human being in one area, but in another you are in need of renovation. People let themselves go sometimes and nobody is perfect, don’t worry, just be honest. When you are still quite young you are in a developing stage. All the troubles and strifes of life with its demands and twisting, turning paths will form a person. Often we can’t help being the person we have become. So it’s good to work hard on yourself when you are young. strive to be the best you can and as you age and mature, life will bless you for your efforts.
When I was younger, I suffered from intense shyness. It crippled me whenever I wanted to be in the company of people who I thought were my friends. They tried to involve me in activities, but as soon as I realised that the spot-light was on me I buckled inside and was so afraid that I couldn’t speak. This led to the others giving up on me and falling prey to their own weaknesses of taunting me. In their eyes I soon resembled a pretty handy punch bag whenever they needed one. As time went by, I realised that I couldn’t spend the rest of my life being afraid of people and being crippled mentally by a feeling that I couldn’t even define. I began to read books about people and how they behaved and why they behaved in certain ways. I read Dale Carnegie’s ” How to Win Friends and Influence People” It fascinated me. I began to read about different religions and was glad to discover that we’ve had few pretty wise people on this earth. This made me think a lot about the case of my problems and so I began to find out about myself. I literally put myself into situations where I knew that I would become centre of attention and therefore left to the mercies of those around me. But, before I did this I made a plan. Very simply I thought about what the typical reaction was that caused me to be overcome with shyness – and therefore stop talking and appear to be in panic – and I prepared a script of just a few words that would help as a scaffold to create a conversation and continue as long as my shaky legs would allow.
The next time I had the opportunity to be amongst people and speak to them, I used the basic script which was about football and the weather. Somebody spoke to me, I replied and then immediately began to ask pre-scripted questions about the football results. The people I was with smiled and answered me. It gave me confidence to continue, so I did. I talked about the last football match and how the weather might affect the next match – which led me to asking questions. My companions seemed to have seen me with new eyes and helped the conversation along with questions too. During this time I realised how much fun it is to actually lead and command a conversation. I discovered that I actually possessed the opposite to shyness in me and that enjoyed speaking to groups of people. I developed this idea and it gave me strength and self-knowledge. I’ve spoken to groups in business presenations and given classes to large groups and I love every minute of it. I always go prepared and with a feeling of giving something worthwhile to people. My legs are as solid as a rock today.
How to Talk: Secrets of the Great Communicators + Bonuses!
Well, since then I’ve been finding lots of things out about myself and all of it has been of great value to me in my search for success and achievement in life. It has all made me a happier more self-confident person. I’ve read so many self-improvement books – good ones and bad ones!- I am lucky that I have discovered how to know myself and through sef knowledge I have discovered that a human being can change and express oneself with power.
Travel the Road to Success.
Gaining insight into your own soul is a personal journey. You must “travel the road” to be able to obtain the secrets of your own soul. Nobody can tell you what you want. If you follow the goals of others, then you are a follower and you will be unhappy. You won’t experience the joy of being a motivated,goal oriented person when you are only following. Demand freedom of choice and decide wholeheartedly that you will obtain the things that you need and desire then you will succeed.
Educate yourself about how others have achieved their goals. Study their ways and read their books and autobiographies. You can mine information that will serve you and help you formulate ideas about what you want and how to achieve it.
Don’t forget; your success is already within you. You must work on yourself to find it and follow your true self to reach your goals. Learn from others, read,read and read more then sit down and think about yourself and what your goals are. When you know what you want take action and enjoy the journey to successful accomplishment of your goals.
Thanks for reading,
Sean Durham
If you’re interested in exploring more ideas about self development and success, then follow the link below to
Dale Carnegie Training.
